Obsessive Compulsive

Angie & Joan: 2 of my former obsessions...

I was a fairly strange child. At the very least, I had strange hobbies and interests. I realize this now. By child, I mean roughly the ages of 9-14. At about 14 or 15 I became obsessed with sex, drinking, drugs and the pursuit of popularity and all my other hobbies and interests fell by the wayside.

My first obsession was with ”Charlie’s Angels.” All things Jill, Sabrina & Kelly. Posters, magazines, books, trading cards. The show itself was secondary. I used to secretly stay up late (10-11 Wednesdays ABC)and watch it on a tiny Zenith B&W TV. As far as the trading cards, I wouldn't just buy the packs, I would buy entire boxes. I think the girl at the candy store thought I was demented.

I also had a thing for Steve Austin and Jamie Sommers. And "Three's Company." And "Wonder Woman" with Lynda Carter. And "Soap." I was very precocious. I remember watching "Soap" with my family and deliberately laughing out loud at jokes I did not understand because I wanted them to think I understood them. Sometimes they would talk about me in the third person with me right there: "Does he know what a lesbian is? I don't think he does."

At some point in there, I got into DC Comics. It was the late 70s and was probably the worst era ever for comic art and storylines but I religiously purchased weekly comics for about a dozen titles. That continued for about a year. I still have them but they are worthless.

I was very excessive as a child. They used to show a lot of old movies on TV then and they often had theme weeks. I particularly remember "The 4:30 Movie" and "The Morning Movie." The themes were often things like "Spies," "Mysteries" and "Edgar Allen Poe." If I was sick on a Monday and Tuesday, I would watch the morning movie which aired at 10AM and just have to see the rest of the week's morning movies. (This was pre-VCR.) So I would feign continuing illness to do so. I remember staying home an entire week once just to watch "Bikini Beach Week" and some of the worst early 60s beach flicks ever produced. But I had to complete the circle.

I also liked to read and at some point I got very into the Bios and Autobios of old Hollywood actresses. I don't know why I would ever want to read about Joan Crawford or Shelley Winters or Susan Hayward or Evelyn Keyes. I do know for certain that my friends had no idea who Susan Hayward and Evelyn Keyes were. They did know Joan because the "Mommie" book had come out and they knew Shelley because she was in "The Poseidon Adventure" and ”The Initiation of Sarah” and everyone saw "The Initiation of Sarah."

But two books I read and read repeatedly were ”Edie” and ”Savage Grace.” (I understand "Savage Grace" is filming now with Julianne Moore as Babs Daly Baekland.) I think it was because I so longed to be transported into the environment of those books (60s Manhattan.)

But anyway, back to my obsessions. In around 7th grade I got really into starlets and B Movie Actresses of the 50s and 60s. I especially loved 8 x 10 B & W studio shots. There was something so appealing to me about the smoothness, the artifice. I sent away for catalogs from Movie Star News and Jerry Ohlinger's Movie Material Store and many others. I used to study that MSN catalog. I remember B & W stills were $2 each and I would often send $10 cash and hope for the best. You could not often specify which stills you wanted and they had so many so oftentimes you would simply order a name and specify "portrait" or "evening dress" or something like that. I relied on them to furnish the "best" shot and mostly I was happy. Except for this really cheesey Dalia Lavi silly costume cheesecake that I'm still annoyed about...

Anyway, I totally kept this from my parents. I think it was primarily because I did not want them interfering. It was not because they would think I was weird because they were weird, too, but more so they would just not start a conversation with me about it. My parents were very critical and I could not stand the thought of them telling me I was wasting my money or telling me I should ask my father to write a check instead of sending cash because then they would have to be involved and want to know what photos I was ordering. I liked it much better as a secret, something I could shop for buy and keep with them knowing nothing about it.

While I liked a lot of the girls, the big queen of my 8 x 10s was Angie Dickinson. I loved Angie. And that she was still a viable commodity in the present day was even better. I think seeing "Dressed to Kill" in 1981 cemented it for me. Angie was hot.

Aside from Angie, I really dug Marilyn clones, Bond girls, copycat Bond girls, 1960s Euro imports and just about every starlet in every Hammer movie & every Matt Helm movie. Here's a partial list:

Sheree North--A great combo of warmth and vitality.
Cleo Moore--Grade Z Marilyn Clone but something pathetically raw about her.
Joan Collins--1950s.
Anita Ekberg--The Iceberg.
Tina Louise--Circa "God's Little Acre."
Julie Newmar--In her "Newmeyer" days.
Elke Sommer--Circa 1959-65.
Ursula Andress--John Derek 1950s Swiss starlet days.
Honor Blackman--Avengers-Goldfinger.
Suzy Parker--NYC & Hollywood & Dorian Leigh was her sister.
Barbara Steele--Rank Studio days.
France Nuyen--"In Love and War."
Nancy Kwan--60s icing.
Karin Dor--Helga Brandt.
Dahlia Lavi--More 60s icing but Shirley Eaton saying she had BO on the set of "10 Little Indians" kind of soured me on her.
Virna Lisi--Sublime looks.
Sylva Koscina--"Jessica."
Luciana Paluzzi--"Thunderball" to "99 Women."
Sharon Tate--"The Wrecking Crew."
Sandro Milo--"Juliet of the Spirits."
Gila Golan--"Valley of the Gwangi."
Martine Beswick--Hammer & Bond.
Ingrid Pitt--Hammer
Julie Ege--Hammer
Caroline Munro--Hammer & Bond and the last of a breed in my opinion.

Anyway, like I said way at the top, at some point I became more interested in my dick and the dicks of others and all those girls took a backseat, but I still have the 8 x 10 glossies...

P.S.--And special props to Susan Kohner who was so affecting in her few roles and gave it all up to raise John & Chris Weitz.