the REAL Sarah

Initiation of Sarah Remake


Initiation of Sarah Original

Everyone who knows me knows I love TV Movies of the 70s, a time when hitchhiking in cut-offs would almost certainly lead to prostitution. Well, I have waxed poetic on this blog somewhere about my love for seminal TV Movie Initiation of Sarah with Kay Lenz as a Carrie White type. Imagine my utter dismay when I saw this notice in the post (above.) Give credit where credit is due. This is a remake. I am disturbed.

I also have the ultimate reference guide to every single TV Movie made and aired in the 60s and 70s, caption for IoS above. Look at that cast...

Daniel Craig

Craig, Daniel Craig

Alright, plain and simple: if you ever are at a loss as to what to get me for Xmas or my birthday, he will do fine.

He deviates slightly from my type as he has fair hair but he is short and stocky and what I wouldn't give to pound his ass silly.

ass wipe

I can be fairly nasty---both verbally and physically---but only when provoked. This often occurs on the foul subway.

Today, on my way home, I was forced to nearly knock a man over as he was walking up the stairs and I was running down as there was---gasp---an N at 14th street heading to Brooklyn. This happens very rarely and I get as excited about it as old foreign women do when they see the Virgin Mary's face in a potato chip.

Anyway, it was rush hour and this guy was slow, was walking on the left side of the stairs and should have known better. He was also youngish and fairly hale and hearty, yet he looked so stricken when faced with me barelling towards him.

Well, lo and behold, I got on the train and it was a Q. The Q and the N have huge cars and the letter is barely discernible on the outside of the train if it is already stopped so half the time you do not know until you are on it. So, I got off at Canal to wait for the fabled N.

Canal is hell: I have seen Chinese people picking their noses, eating all sorts of rubbish, and chattering crowding pushing jostling. Today I had a grown woman drinking an iced drink through a fat straw and she kept sucking it up and then letting it back into the big paper glass. Suck, let go, suck, let go, suck, let go. It made the most repulsive noise and that is when I began to want to push her against the wall and pour her drink on the tracks.

When the train came, some people pushed ahead of me onto the car and I was getting on and people were still getting off and this guy getting off totally tensed his body really hard and did a kind of barrel through me thing. So I looked at him and just scowled and kind of growled a low disgusted "watch out." It was really good.

Then, as he's getting off the train he starts with, all flustered, as he's moving and a million people are still getting off and on: "Why don't you wait until I'm off the train you, you ass wipe! You stupid fuck!" The guy was so lame and it was so funny because I'm sure nobody heard me but everyone on the train and the plat heard him and thought he was psycho muttering to himself. But gotta love ass wipe. Wow, that hurts. For about 5 minutes I kinda fantasized about getting off the train and just pounding his face into pulp. Then I felt better.

She Does Not Use Botox

Unless it is reconstructive, I think plastic surgery is generally for losers (sorry, entire country of Brazil.) I think Botox is for bigger losers. I think it is so funny how it is now de rigeur to look scary-smooth whether you are in entertainment, media or are just some dumb, competitive yoga-loving mommy. I had a 2 year period where I was an ultra buff, food-measuring, caliper toting, Gucci wearing, self-tanning, facial-having slave. It was so much work and so boring amd all I ever got out of it was feeling shallowly elitist once in a while and the problem with that is that there is always someone who is better at the whole thing than you. So I stopped and came to realize that it is the domain of the shallow and insecure. The funny part is before I could barely get laid, now I can't keep 'em off me :-)

Anyway, I now have a new hero: Patricia Wettig. I used to like her on Thirty-something. She was kind of cranky and mean, but compelling, kind of like Betty Buckley on Eight is Enough...I never would have wanted Abby as my step-mom, she was a little cranky.

Well, Wettig has a role on "Brothers and Sisters." She is probably, maybe in her early to mid 50s and she is replendent in her wrinkles! I love it, crows feet, crinkles and big killer valleys. I am so in love. She looks fantabulous. It's confidence and confidence is fucking sexy.